Ricardo Lindinkosi Yoko left a gang and has taken back control of his life by being positive and knowing what he wants from life.

Hi Mzansi, I am Lindinkosi, Ricardo Yoko. I'd like to tell you the story of my relationship with my father. It is the story of a young man from a very complicated background, growing up in Zone 5 in Thembalethu, George. Just like most young people in South Africa, I've been affected by poverty, violence, you name it. Things weren't easy growing up, but I had a great relationship with my father.

Every time I'd see his car come into the driveway, I'd run to him and say, “Hi Daddy, how are you?” Even though I was involved in some bad stuff, I'd pretend to be this good kid. I'd be acting all innocent, knowing that I was doing some stuff I didn't want him to know about. But the truth can't be hidden forever and eventually when he found out I was drinking, smoking, going partying and having sex, it was so sad.

We decided to have a chat. He asked me how my life was going and I said that everything was cool, nothing was bothering me. But he was my father. He could see through me. He knew exactly what was going on. One day, it was a Wednesday; I was so surprised when he confronted me. “My son, you're lying. Your life is not perfect,” he said, “I know what you're doing. Don't ever think that I don't know what you're doing. You're my son. I've been there, my child, I know what it's like being a teenager growing up.” But how could he understand? He didn't grow up in the 21st century. He grew up in his time, but now it's my time, things are different.

Things got worse and there was this one week in September – it was the week of dark clouds - when I started stealing really badly and robbing people. There was a Spaza shop on the corner of our street and we'd sit there and wait for people. We'd take their money and buy booze – nothing important. We even started stealing cell phones. Nokia's, Motorola's, everything. My Dad spoke to me again. “Don't ever think that I don't know what you're up to,” he said, “This is your life.” I knew I was bringing pain on my family. It was the darkest moment of my life. I felt like I'd done something terrible, but 2 days later I was back with the gang having fun.

A few months later, my father called me and started lecturing me. “My son, let's sit. You are my son and I love you and I am tired of beating you,” he said. “I know that beating you will not solve problems, so I'm trying to talk to you. You see the role model that I am. I wish that you could be better than me, because look, you have young brothers. What are they going to learn from you? This is your life. You only live once and after that, you're gone.” Those words hit me. I thought, “Yoh! What is going on with this guy? Will he abandon me?” But my father carried on, “My child, I love you so much and I will do whatever it takes to protect you, but I can't choose your friends. You're the only one who can make that choice for your life.” He'd been lecturing me non stop for months, but these words hit home. Still, two days later I was back with the gang.

Then one day this guy from the gang came straight up to my house driving a BMW, shouting “Spinna spinna, cuppa cuppa!” and I just said no. I took one moment, one moment of silence and thought, “Is this the life I really want? I'm actually the bad guy, one of the black sheep in the family. How do I get out of this?” I wanted to quit, to quit everything, to start a fresh new life.

The hardest part of all was the changing process. I had to let go of everything - all the friends that I had. It was very tough. As I tried to tell them that I was a new person, they told me, “You know what? You can never leave the gang! Gang for life!” So, I started avoiding them – just hanging around at home, having family meals, having meetings, watching my father's car when he came home from work. Then they started calling me names: “Mama's baby! Stupid! You're not cool!” It really hurt me so badly. I just wanted to fit in and be part of that crew – the coolest guys in the community. A week later I was back again. I decided I wanted to be with these guys.

I wanted to quit, to quit everything, to start a fresh new life.

One Sunday I was at church and the pastor said, “God created you for a reason. Now you are using the reason God created you in a negative way.” I got back from church and prayed and eventually God sent an angel out of nowhere: GOLD Peer Education. It actually came to change my life. Still there was peer pressure - those guys didn't stop calling me names. But I overcame those obstacles. How? By really focusing on myself, being positive and telling myself what I want from life. I don't need that life. I don't have to go there. I started joining youth programmes and getting involved in my community.

Five years later, I'm a different person. Now, I can look back and say I am actually a role model to those young people looking up to me. I can tell stories to them. I can tell them I have done that, but they don't have to go through that in order to become what I am today. Now I have dreams. I can sit visualizing them and say, “You know what? Two years from now I will be there!”

So, what will you make out of your life? Do you want to end up in jail? Do you want to make the most out of your life? Do you say no, when it time to say no? Do you control life or does life control you? These days I am controlling my own life, with God by my side.